Communicating with Alzheimer’s Patients Spirit-To-Spirit

04 Jun Communicating with Alzheimer’s Patients Spirit-To-Spirit

I first realized my wife, Julie, was in the early stages of Alzheimer’s over seven years ago. We had the opportunity to have some discussions about what that would mean for our lives together, and how it would affect us in coming years. We both agreed that being placed in a nursing home was NOT something either one of us wanted. I promised her that I would take care of her at home for as long as I was physically able to do so, realizing of course that it would become increasingly difficult to do so. I really had no idea how difficult it would be.

In my therapy practice (I always felt like I was practicing and learning constantly), I had the opportunity to work with many clients who were in the early stages too, or with actual caregivers who were wrestling with how to best take care of their loved ones. It was pretty obvious that no matter how much love there was in the relationship, it was extremely difficult to be in the caregiving role. In relationships that were tenuous to begin with, managing the tasks of being a caregiver weren’t even considered for a moment. It was a fairly gone conclusion that anyone suffering from any type of dementia would automatically be placed in an assisted living or memory care facility as soon as possible. I never worked with anyone who willingly wanted to go into any type of institutional care. There are many reasons for that, of course, but that is not the point of this particular blog.

In the early stages, my wife’s behavior was classic paranoia, terrific mood swings, and many bouts of crying due to the fear of not knowing or understanding what was happening. As a therapist, I knew that dementia affects people differently, and it was my responsibility to figure out how to manage the situation to the best of my ability. Easier said than done.

I very quickly realized that my own behavior had a huge impact on my wife’s perceptions and subsequent emotions. I was dealing with my own frustration of lost dreams, lack of freedom to go anywhere I wanted and not have to worry about her, fear of what was to come, and my own fear that I was not going to be able to measure up to the task for which I had promised. Early on, my actions and reactions were occasionally triggering Julie into exhibiting fearful or angry responses. Every time a confrontation of any type arose, I learned to take a breath and reflect on what I had just done that may have actually caused it. Unfortunately, I realized I was more to blame than I wanted to admit.
Many times, over the years, I was pushed to the point of giving up and just wanting to run away from home. Obviously, not the most therapeutic approach to the situation. (Did I mention I was human?). Each time I reached the point of emotional overload, I had to let go of whatever I was trying to hold onto and allow the flow of new insight guide me.

It was a webinar with Suzanne Giesemann, a world renowned medium, that offered a revelation that would change my perception and experience of life with Julie. Suzanne is famous for her ability to communicate with spirits who have since passed from this world into the afterlife. I know this a controversial perspective for some people to comprehend, but I have had enough of my own experiences to know that it is very real. Suzanne spoke of communicating in real time with someone who had Alzheimer’s and was very content with her situation. It was a real eye-opener for me because I realized I could be communicating with Julie as a spirit, which goes beyond just talking with her body and mind in its current condition.

In my morning meditation, I started communicating directly with her spirit, which allowed her to decide what information worked for her and what didn’t. She had, up until this point in time, been somewhat unpredictable in her behavior. Everyday was an adventure in…”now what?” After I began speaking with her telepathically, she became happier and more content in her everyday activities. If she did, for whatever reason, become agitated about something, I could fall back into a meditative state and ask her what was happening to her. At this point, she had lost the cognitive ability to articulate what she was feeling, so it was my only and best option. I would, of course, have to keep a smile on my face for her to see and a neutral body language, which would not cause her to feel threatened in any way.

Julie passed away recently, but I know the last couple of years were much better for her because of our ability to communicate spirit-to-spirit. When she was in hospice care, and unresponsive according to the doctors, she would come to me in visions that let me know she was happy in her renewed state of spiritual awareness. It was very gratifying to me to know that I could keep my promise to her and she had completed her karmic cycle just as she planned.

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