How Do We Change Our Genetic Programming?

15 Oct How Do We Change Our Genetic Programming?

Photo by Jesse Orrico on Unsplash
We grew up being taught by the science of the time that we were all products of our genetic programming.  More accurately, growing up, we get programmed primarily by family, but also by school, places of worship, and our circle of friends.  This tends to be driven by our own need to belong, to be accepted, and to fit in ‘with the crowd.’  I know this is mixing “nature vs nurture,” but there is a reason for doing so.

Bruce Lipton, in his marvelous work entitled “The Biology of Belief,” does an incredible job of scientifically explaining how our brains are hard-wired into various beliefs which can affect us our whole life.  But he also very clearly proves that we can change our genetics by making conscious choices in how we act and react to life situations.

This is never more obvious than in marital or couple counseling.  You take two individuals and put them together in a relationship and each are working through their family genetic programming.  We grow up believing that relationships are supposed to work a certain way, but then when we try to put that into practice we discover that what we were taught or pick up through our own observation just doesn’t work the way we thought it should.  In general, the communication in a relationship involves each person trying to reconcile their own belief and trying to get validation for that belief.  Given the almost 50% divorce rate in this country, it obviously doesn’t work very well.

I have asked hundreds of clients the same question and got nearly the same answer from all of them.  The question was, “As a child growing up, what was your dream relationship going to be like for you?”  The answers were similar in that they always included finding their soulmate and living happily ever after…just like in the movies.  The reality, of course, was very different.

There seems to be a tendency to buy into the dream that we meet, fall in love, get married, have kids, and live happily ever after…or some variation of that theme.  When we realize that something isn’t working the way we thought it should, if we are aware and thinking, we usually begin a process of self-reflection and examination.  When what we have learned to believe conflicts with our own experience, it is important to realize that we have the conscious ability to change what we believe and make different choices in our behavior.

This is where personal growth really begins and we can consciously rewire our brains to actively respond in the moment using such methods as meditation, tapping, positive affirmations, or quantum coding.  It is important to know that your brain holds the results of all of your thinking, but it is your mind that creates the thoughts that are stored in your brain.  Because of the neuroplasticity of the brain, and its never-ending ability to create new neuro pathways, it is always possible to let go of old beliefs and create new ones.  Just knowing that you have this ability is a giant leap in your spiritual awareness, and one that continue to benefit throughout your whole life.

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